So we're starting from scratch, like I have just been diagnosed...Well it pretty much feels like I have so will go with it for now. Everyday a letter or a call booking me in for something, Only missing one appointment missing now then I'll have my full set. It's all starting to sink in now and feeling more real and with that comes less sleep and more nerves!!! WOW. I'm going through days of purely tears and some of...pff it's all going to be fine, it's me, this wouldn't happen to me!
So I have some dates through, two main important ones:
6th Feb 2 CT's and an Ultrasound. Thank goodness the Ultrasound is first as I know what I have to drink before my CT ;) that would have been interesting the other way round lol
16th March Oh gosh the results, But it's only the results if they achieve getting an old CT scan from my local hospital from 2 1/2 years ago and my CT from pre op little over 3 years ago. If they don't get them then I don't know what this is.
I don't know what I'm hoping the outcome is... Ok obviously "Hey they disappeared!" would be perfect!!! but with the new tumours showing up I'm seriously doubting that's it. "The original one hasn't grown but you do have new ones", that's an ok outcome, better than others I can think of.
But right now it is literally my mind doing over time and no matter how much people say to you "It's going to be fine, just stop thinking about it" yep, lets just say that's not going to happen, worst sentence ever! You can't stop the mind doing it's thing. So for now keeping as busy as I can and during the bad moment speaking to the people I love , not to much as to make them fed up with me but enough to keep me sane.
Thank you all for being so amazing <3 I owe you all big time!
No comments:
Post a Comment